Of Vacations and Points

Using every last point... whether we want to or not.

A long time ago, before it was stupid, Bob and I purchased a "vacation ownership" in Cancun.   When we actually went to Cancun, the place we bought wasn't completed so we stayed in beautiful suites in the gorgeous Le Meridian hotel there (at their expense) and after that, we didn't pay too much attention to the "rules" of the timeshare.  We forgot about the time share.

Because it was too hard.

Let me just say that we did a LOT better with vacations plans when we just took advantage of all the timeshare companies who were pursuing us.  Back in the day (do they still do this?), if you made a certain income and were on some brand named hotel list, you were constantly getting calls and mailings  offering free rooms and excursions - sometimes even plane fare, to come to spend a few days at some great resort if you would only commit to the "45 minute" presentation.  In truth, you are in there 2 hours and 45 minutes but we went to Hawaii, Florida, San Diego, Las Vegas, San Francisco, and countless weekends - basically for free - so to give them 3 hours of time in exchange seemed fair.

And we were fair.  We told them at booking that we wouldn't buy.  They didn't care.  Because eventually, they know they'll wear you down.

I think timeshare sales people should train ALL other sales people in any other kind of business.  There is no argument they haven't got a brilliant answer for.  They show you the numbers. They get you emotionally.  And we almost bought several times.  We were sooooo close to a two bedroom ocean view at the Marriott in Maui.  But we finally got hooked on a free weekend to a beautiful resort in Palm Springs.

You get so seduced by the promise.  In our case, a 900 square foot ocean view unit in Cancun.

"The resort is almost finished and your unit will come with a full kitchen - fully stocked, washer/dryer in the unit, large sunken jacuzzi tub and huge glass shower, dining room, living room, bedroom, private balcony for outdoor dining, sleeps 5, granite counters in kitchen and bathroom, beautifully decorated and landscaped, infinity pools, three restaurants, private beach,..."

 (You close your eyes and you're suddenly being featured on "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous".)

"...and on alternate years you can easily trade it for one of two properties we have in Hawaii - one on Maui, the newest on Kauai..."

(Oh yes of yes of yes oh yes oh yes....)

"... and here is a beautiful coffee table book (for you to keep) showing all our properties across the country.  And since your unit is worth more, you can trade it when you feel like it for longer stays at other resorts..."

(Because every year in Cancun or Hawaii would be such a bore.)

"...and every year the cost for hotel rooms go up dramatically - current prices for similar accommodations are anywhere between $2500 and $5000 a week..."

(That is true...)

"...and if you sign today only, I can offer you an additional 50,000 points and a free weekend in La Jolla and dinner tonight in our 5-star restaurant..."

(Wow Bob, it is actually costing us money not to buy this...)

"...and you can always turn your vacation ownership points into points for our 5-star hotels all over the world!   Paris, Rome, Greece and we don't want you to make this commitment unless you want to but here is a pen..."

Valri J. Smith.  Signed.

And while our heads were spinning and our hearts were beating fast and we were wondering if they really did slip something into our drink, they said:

"Now we don't want you to leave until you really understand how this works."

Except they really did want us to leave before we really understood how it works because they take this moment to pull out a four-page, color coded grid with dots and dates and codes and I think it was written in Klingon - and they knew that if we were there too long we would say: "Wait a minute!  What the hell is this?  How will I ever be able to figure this out?  It is more complicated than furniture assembly instructions by Ikea!"

But we nod yes, yes, we understand because we had to get out of that room before we passed out.  And off we went with our little bag of books, and contracts, and instructions.  And as we walked we shook and held each other up and kept telling each other we had just done a good thing.  And the many thousand of dollars we spent was actually responsible.  I mean, we can will it to the girls.

But what we eventually figured out is that we have these windows of time where we can book our vacation - always too far in advance.  If we miss it, we have only a certain amount of time before we can book something else.  If it is available.  (So forget about Hawaii.)  Because we are only guaranteed our requested time in the resort we bought.  In Cancun.  If we book it within the window.  And if we miss that, and - big if - we don't miss the cut off date - can transfer the points to next year.  For a fee.  Or if we haven't missed another date, we can maybe turn them into hotel points.  For a fee.   But 50,000 resort points (a week in your timeshare) converts to about 10,000 hotel points (about a day in a mid-level hotel).  And if you have missed this opportunity, you lose all the points.  ForEVER!

And so we did.  Lose them, that is.  But we're not off the hook for the $400 annual home ownership.  (I don't remember talking about that...)

So we decided to sell it.  And it was at this precise moment when we felt the word "LOSER" start burning itself onto our foreheads.

We have kicked ourselves in the shins multiple times now for wasting this investment so we finally used it this year for a family vacation in Arizona where all 6 of us attended (and lived palatially)for a full week.  It was totally worth it.   And we still had some points left over and so Bob, never to waste a time share point again, booked us three days in Palm Springs. At an inconvenient time.  Because we nearly missed a cut off.  And we'd lose the points if we didn't go.

So here I sit.  We have returned.  Scene of the crime.

Having a mah-ve-lous time, Mr. Leach.