And in Today's News...

Okay.

I needed to take a day to clear my mind.  

I want to begin by stating that I do NOT intend for this blog to be all about our current administration. But my decision to begin writing again and the start of a second term for the current president,  coincidentally aligned.  When literally daily, the entire nation is seeing and reading the most outrageous edicts and acts of "the-one-who-shall-not-be-named",  its hard to ignore.  

We experienced a national tragedy on Wednesday night.  We lost 67 people in a horrible mid air crash above the Potomac.  In the immediate hours following this event, while the country tried to wrap its mind around the loss of life, dreams, hope, and potential in the worst airplane disaster in decades, this country's leader took the opportunity to take the podium and engage in another of his mind-numbing, self-serving, rambling, non sequitur rants focused primarily on the "fact" that the crash was due to DEI hires.  Before we had ANY information, while we are still waiting for the recovery of all the bodies, before the recovery of any black box, before any information about who was working in the air traffic control tower or whether or not protocols had been followed, when asked by a member of the press how he could conclude the disaster was caused by a DEI hire, the Commander in Chief of our great nation responded: "Because I have common sense".  

Here's some common sense:  If you are a member of ANY minority, prepare yourself.

Simultaneously, we are grappling with pages of Project 2025 directives being launched with a flick of his poisonous pen.

To say nothing of those he wishes to surround himself with: 

As Secretary of Defense: a misogynistic, alcoholic, weekend "entertainment" commentator who has nothing that even nears a genuine education, experience, or qualification for the job,

As Head of the FBI: a proven liar and QAnon consipracy sympathizer, who promises to turn FBI headquarters in to a "Museum of the deep state" who has nothing that even nears a genuine education, experience, or qualification for the job,

As Health and Human Services Director: a former drug addict and aggressive anti-vaxer who stated in his hearing that citizens are unhappy with Medicade because premiums and co-pays we too high, and who apparently has a dead worm in his brain and has nothing that even nears a genuine education, experience or qualification for the job,

As National Intelligence Director: a party-jumping politician with alarming associations with traitors and foreign enemies and has nothing that even nears a genuine education, experience, or qualification for the job,

and so many more!  

And that's the latest news from what just has to be the alternative universe.

Is this Real Life??

As you might imagine, people who publish their thoughts do not publish ALL of them.  I have more drafts in my blog than those I sent out into the universe.  

Such is the case with one I started on November 9, 2016:

It is November 9th, 12:08 a.m.  I haven't written a thing in years.  But I cannot sleep tonight and I felt like going here to try to make sense of what just happened to our country, to my family.  To me.

When it became clear that we were going to elect the most unqualified person I could possibly imagine to lead our country for the next four years, I broke down and sobbed.  I was surprised at the depths from where my sobs came.  And I cried for a good long while.  My husband came and my daughter as well and we all just held each other.  We all cried.

For those who believed Hillary Clinton was "a crook", well, I haven't anything to say to you.  For those of you who believe that Donald Trump is a  brilliant visionary who will lead us into "greatness" and put us all on the road to "winning", well, I have less to say to you.

I truly am frightened about what lies ahead for our nation and the world as a result of this impossible outcome.  We are not "one nation, under God, indivisible".  We are severely divided.  What monsterous moth has been eating away at the very fabric of this country to cause such anger and fear?

So unbelievably, we brought him back, in 2024.

I can hear "delete" clicks as I type this.  You can cancel me,  cancel away.  Perhaps I'm just preaching to the choir.  But something unspeakable is happening to this country.

So much has been said already.  And it truly does feel as though I am dreaming.  In fact, I honestly DO wake up some mornings and turn on the news and suddenly remember, "Wait!  That really did happen"!  And yes, it did.  And even more bizarre, some people - in fact a LOT of people - are actually happy about it.  In fact, some people I love are happy about it.  And frankly, I just don't know what to do with that.

This was not a normal election.  It was many times more cataclysmic than 2016.  Because now, Trump is emboldened.  And he is not making the mistake of hiring reasonably qualified people to fill his cabinet.  The last time around, he hired and fired routinely as soon as his self-proclaimed "Best People"  woke up and said "Oh my God!  What unspeakable hell is this?".  No, this time he is assigning the most important cabinet seats on earth to unqualified, spineless, alcoholic, corrupt lemmings and "yes men" (and women) to help him usher in the end of our Republic.  Just because he can.

During the first week of his presidency, he has used his alarming jagged, maniacal signature to sign a stunning number of executive orders ranging from controversial and compassionless to ruthless, retributive, and unconstitutional.  His juvenile posts from his very own social media site read as though written by a petulant, spoiled, embarrassing 12 year old.  He is fearless this time around, courtesy of the unscrupulous and nefarious "justices" Trump forced onto the Supreme Court by bullying a congress of cowards set on selling their own souls rather than face the possibility of of an election without his "support".  And as a reward, we now have a president who operates above all law.  For those of you who may be offended by my rant, please understand:  The law does not apply to Trump!  Ever!  For anything!  Even Murder.  (And if you don't believe me, google it. )

And I cringe when I hear "all politicians are the same", "all politicians are corrupt", all politicians lie".  Yes, I know.  You want to know HOW I know?  Because all humans have episodes of corruption and all humans lie.  But this corruption and lying is premeditatively designed to take down a most noble experiment of governance.  And our forefathers warned us about what could happen if we voted in a tyrant.  

So when faced with what appears to be a formidable, overwhelming, and unstoppable force, what can we do?  We can fight back.

Final thought:  Beware of normal looking men (and women) who have somehow convinced you of what you need and then promised you everything.  Make sure you ask to see their teeth.

Hello! Is Anybody There?

I decided I wanted to write a little bit again.   So I was thinking: "I can't post on 'Dumping My Purse'!  Its been too long.  It would be too weird."  Then I remembered that "Dumping My Purse" was my site and I can do whatever the hell I want

Me, 2009

 On June 22, 2009, I posted my very first composition on my blog.  I named the blog "Dumping My Purse".  The last time I posted was July 22, 2014.  It has remained dormant for nearly 16 years.  

Yesterday, with a LOT of time on my hands, I re-read quite a number of my posts and in truth, they weren't bad.  Some of them were "meh" but some of them were pretty good.  And a couple of them made me laugh out loud.  I'm not embarrassed by any of them (although they do tend to be lengthy).  So here we go.  Let's see if the old gal still has some chops.

I've spent some time in review.  I have entered into an entirely new "season". (We say "season" now instead of "age" but frankly, no matter the word you use, it all says "old".)

I've posted "then and now" photos of me.  These photos were chosen to make you think: "Wow she looks great!  She's hardly aged!"  I assure you nothing could be further from the truth. The photo from 2024 was attempted about 7 times before it successfully hid a massive double chin.  And while I wore sunglasses in 2009 due to bright sun, the glasses in 2024 are also for cosmetic reasons.  Your eyes may be the windows to your soul but they also rudely scream the ravages of time.  Not that I am ashamed to be my age (ahem) but I'll need a little more courage to reveal exactly how hold I am.  Let's just say I was an adult when big shoulders, big earrings, and big hair were in fashion.  And I wore them all well.  And I learned to type when it was standard that you add two spaces between sentences.  Okay, okay.  I'm 67.

Me, 2024

If you had kids before 2014 when I last posted, like I did, they are all grown and gone now.  Some of us have married, some divorced.  Some re-married.  Some have become grandparents and some are very happily single.  Some have lived the dream, and some have lost it all.  Sadly, some have died. 

Time marches on - for better or worse.  I've had a bit of both.  The best being retirement and a great deal of wonderful travel.  The worst being that my oldest daughter, Amanda, had to go through breast cancer (she is fine now).  I image I will pull from these experiences from time to time as I write.  I still have a lot of things to talk about.  Sadly, brevity is not my strength.  I hope people who choose to read this "season" of blogging will find it entertaining but in truth, at this point in my life, I am writing it for me.  Something to leave behind for my kids someday.

One thing that hasn't changed at all?  My lipstick.  Clinique "Black Honey".  My shade forever.

Next time:  The toad that occupies the White House.

Jane's Breasts

Last week, Jane ("Reconnected", August 6, 2009) had these beautiful photographs of her gorgeous 52-year-old-but-who'd-ever-believe-it body taken.  They were taken as her "before" photos.  This week she will have a mastectomy.  Lurking behind those beautiful breasts are unwanted collections of rogue cells.  She has cancer.

Can't you tell?

Jane wanted pictures taken of her body before her surgery.  When I first saw these photos, the sight of her loveliness so distracted me from the subject at hand that the only thing that crossed my mind was "did mine ever look that good?"

I haven't really spoken with Jane in a while so this news was very jarring.  As I have been reading her inspiring Facebook page (My Journey With Breast Cancer), I have given a lot of thought to Jane and me.  And our breasts.

I have spent a great deal of my adult life being frightened of facing what Jane is facing now.  And one day it could be me as easily as it could be any other woman, so I really tried to put myself in Jane's shoes.  It led me to focus on the importance of a woman's breasts during her life.

We see our breasts every single day of our lives.  I developed modesty about my nipples when I was about 5.  So just think - we had awareness of them even then.  At 11, I realized how much toilet paper it took to fill the space between my flat chest and my mother's bra.  At 12, I prayed that they would start to grow.  Already.  PLEASE!  At 13, when my breast buds started to develop, they hurt and I wondered if I would ever sleep on my stomach again.  At 14, I experienced the power they gave me.  Boys noticed me.  Later in my life, they were an important part of my sexuality.  As a mother, they represented life.  As a woman, they are part of me.  I have dressed to cover them properly while at the same time trying to accentuate them. There is intrigue and mystery and beauty in women's breasts.  It seems to me that if I were to lose them, I would experience true grief.  All women would.

Jane is surely feeling that too.  And I'm sure she is scared and that tears come easily.

It would be easy to be terrified and anxious and angry and paralyzed by news of cancer.  I would struggle with those emotions.  But what Jane seems to have come to terms with is that breast cancer - cells turning against her body - can be treated and overcome.  Ultimately it is temporary. Even for those who die.   What she knows is that the true terror, the real danger is cancer of the spirit.  It is eternal.  From that, Jane is safe.  For Jane, there is no other way: she chooses life.  Big life.  She has embraced this darkness and shed her own, enormous light upon it.  Nothing to fear.  There it is.  And soon it will be gone.  Without her breast, she is undiminished.

It occurs to me that Jane has been going through a season of big purse dumping.  And this week, when her surgery is over, it will be empty.  And pristine.  And she will begin to fill it again.  But with the wisdom of a life she has always to live with joy and courage, she will be selective and purposeful about what goes back in.  Because she knows she is defined not so much by what she carries in her purse, but what she doesn't.  And defeat and sorrow and self pity will not find its way in there.

And that's Jane.

So my prayer for her is that she feels herself comfortably nestled in the palm of God's merciful and loving hand, that His healing breath envelop her, that His spirit fill her and draw her nearer to Him over these next several months, and that she has written on her heart: "For I know the plans I have for you, sayeth the Lord.  Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.  Plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

I'm betting the "after" pictures will be equally stunning.




Jane is going to need a little financial help though - if you feel so inclined, you can give a little at this website:
https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/5345/jane-george-s-breast-cancer-fund

Battle Weary but Back

In the beginning.  No job worries.

I took some time off.   It was a tough year.

Not that everything was bad - it wasn't.  There was a lot of fun stuff too.  But I was on the wrong end of the age and weight spectrum at my job.  And it never occurred to me that that I would ever have to face something like that.

I won't pretend to know what real, lifelong discrimination is about.  I just know what my little year-long struggle was like.  I can't imagine how people survive serious lifelong discrimination without hurting someone.  I guess they have many dreams of retribution.  I did.

We got new management.  I can say without too much hyperbole that the new top dog was as dumb as hair.  Came in and fired just about everyone - but me.  But then came a year of transparent and ridiculous obstacles and attempts to cause me to fail or quit.  I know how corporate structures operate so I knew HR would not be of significant help.  And of course, I was right.   It had nothing to do with performance.  I fought back for nearly a year until they found a way to make sure I would leave.  They changed the requirements of my job.  Suddenly I was required to have more years of experience in the industry than I had.  Nothing I can do about that.  So without notice I was replaced and they moved me over to a position I was not suited for.  In spite of the fact that I was their top producer.

And all the while, they smiled warmly.  Hmmmm.

And that's all there is to say about that.

In walks God, though.  Within three weeks of deciding to surrender, I found myself at a wonderful company that I love.  Management that I love.  Product that I love.  And the package wasn't bad either. I'm into my 4th month there and still feel happy.  Happy about my job.  I had forgotten what that was like.

But for those who never get to the other side of their battle - I don't know what to say.

I ALMOST Saw "World War Z"

It's very hot and as I said in an earlier post, while the tenants of our rental property are enjoying the benefits of a brand new air conditioning unit, we are not.  I have a fan.  So to beat the heat, in spite of fatigue from a stressful week and a very full weekend, I went to the movies with Bob to sit in a cool building with comfortable seats.

I had wanted to see "World World Z" because it looked like a fun alien film, ala "Independence Day" from years ago - with action, humor, a slew of heroes, and an appropriate amount of suspense.  Naturally, Brad Pitt was a draw as well.

This was not that movie.

You should know that I have some sort of issue with the muscle under my left shoulder blade.  This is turn is causing tension and achiness in my left bicep and ultimately, my fingers.  Its sort of a "knee-bone's-connected-to-the-leg-bone" kind of phenomenon.  And really is starts with my neck and I am working like mad to remember to relax my shoulders and willfully release my muscles from a general flexed state.

This movie was counter-productive to that goal.

I cannot tell you much about this film.  Apart from a scene where Brad Pitt is making pancakes for his kids, there is little about this film that gives you a break.  And because that scene comes in the very beginning of the movie, I didn't really need a break yet.

This movie was like "Jurassic Park" meets Michael Jackson's "Thriller" (without the cool choreography).  

Mostly, my eyes were closed but I peeked often enough to see that the CGI was pretty good.  Too good.  One scene made me fairly nauseous.  Early on, I leaned in to Bob and said "I may not make it through this movie.  If not I'll just go sit outside".   But in thinking it though, the record heat today made this option nearly as terrifying.

I used be able to sit through a suspenseful movie or TV show with the best of them but I have noticed a gradual inability to cope.  My  internal "Anxi-o-Meter" starts going ding-ding-ding-ding-ding at the first hint that a restful, peaceful scene is about to be corrupted by an unexpected, sudden entrance of evil.  It doesn't matter that I know it is coming - when it does I nearly pee my pants.

So I just counted my Raisinets, looked at my fingernails, the seat in front of me, Bob, the ceiling, and in all that free time, I realized that the reason we could endure the suspenseful and frightening in films at a younger age was that we didn't have the filter that now keeps us from ruining the experience for those around us.  We were free to scream back at the screen, warn the hero, carry on, and not give a whit about the old guy sitting in front of us.  And I think if I had been able to scream at the Israeli people safe behind the walls (for those of you who have seen it, you know) to stop their singing and shut the hell up, I might have been able to watch the scene unfold.  I understand it was pretty spectacular - as zombie acts go.  I did get a glimpse of a female zombie in a shredded pink dress gyrate and take off toward the action to get her share of human flesh.  I will say too that there was one line in the movie I loved: "Mother Nature is a serial killer".  Great line.  But as a hypochondriac, I will no doubt play it over and over again in my head - everytime I feel the need to see a doctor.

So at the end of the film, I walked away with muscle spasms in my arms and neck and it hurts to type this.  But I am safe now, at home.  And Bob is on the roof with the hose.

And maybe that's what we should have done in the first place.

Post Birthday Reflection

Celebrating my many years...

I worked yesterday, on my birthday.  I was taken to lunch and given gifts.  I was given a lovely red velvet cake and I was pleased.

When I got home - there was a card and a balloon and a cake in the refrigerator.  Bob immediately told me he had been all over all day looking for something to get me but gave up.

Really.

In fairness, I don't even know what I want for my birthday that doesn't cost several thousand dollars.  And it is also true that I will return something I don't want - which I have been known to do.  But after nearly 21 years of marriage, I thought it was fairly unimaginative of him.

What he did bring though was a chocolate cake that he crammed 72 candles on (nearly 20 too many) and lit them all for a "make-a-wish-and-blow-out-the-candle-inferno" photo opportunity.  In spite of it being a horrifying reminder of how flammable my cumulative years have become, I thought it was kind of funny.  I was well lit, anyway.

But there would be a penalty for having brought no gift.  So when we chose a movie to watch and got comfortable and ready to be entertained, I handed Bob my brush and he and Grace took turns brushing my hair.  For the duration of the movie.

Happy Birthday to me.  Best damned present I can think of.

But I'm still going to buy myself something.