August 2nd? What About It?

Last night, August 6th, Grace got out of bed, walked down the hall to the family room where we were, and said: "Mom? Dad? Happy belated anniversary, 4 days ago."

Bob and I looked at each other. On Monday we had been married 19 years. And we completely forgot our anniversary. For the 11th year in a row.

On August 3, 2007, I was sitting pool side at Disney's California Wilderness Lodge after a big client event held at the park the night before. Bob had left early that morning for an audition so I was lounging next to and visiting with a colleague's husband and asked him how he and Jody met. He told me the story and then he asked me how long Bob and I had been married and it was at that moment that I realized that our anniversary had been the day before and we had forgotten - again. I was embarrassed.

But I guess not enough.

Now I ask you, how is that possible? No married couple I know ever forgets their wedding anniversary. Maybe some of the husbands need to be reminded, but never the wives. A couple of weeks ago my friends Jackie & Rick celebrated theirs - Jackie posted a photo on her Facebook. I remember looking at it and thinking that Bob and I would be married 19 years this year. But no bell went off in my mind telling me it was coming up. And clearly nothing went off in Bob's mind.

So I have to look at my calendar and remember how we celebrated.

1. I got up at about 7:30 and went to work in my office.
2. I checked Facebook and wished a friend Happy Birthday (no joke).
3. I read emails.
4. I sent emails.
5. I made phone calls.
6. I ate Jenny Craig for breakfast, lunch and dinner
7. I ran errands and prepared Grace for a 3-day camping trip she was going on.
8. I ate my share of Weight Watcher's frozen yogurt bars.
9. I watched TV.
10. And while I cannot specifically remember it, I'm sure that I had a fight with someone at home because that appears to be the law.

Bob, on the other had, did whatever Bob did. He was here too but I was busy doing what it is that I do so I didn't notice. I know he went to the grocery store at some point.

I googled how we should have spent it. At the 19 year mark, there is no "traditional" gift (although next year I should be in line for some china). The "modern gift" is bronze. Which I suppose could have meant a water feature for outside somewhere. Bob wants one of those. Didn't get that. Jewelry would have been an aquamarine (I have one from husband #1 - never wear it) or a garnet (not a fan). So no jewelry. But then I saw they have a new category - travel gifts for each anniversary. This year we should have gone to the South of France. And I am now officially feeling gypped. It is especially disappointing when I further read that next year (our

20th), we are supposed to go to San Francisco.

So what am I to make of this continual omission from memory of the significance of this date?

Maybe it means something awful. Or maybe not. Who cares? The fact is, we're married. We're sticking to it and I gotta tell you - at pretty big odds. We are hardly what anyone who knows us would call "made for each other". In fact, we are about as different as two people can be. And that has made from some pretty tough times. And interesting. But we love each other.

And we haven't killed each other.

Yet.