Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho, Its Back to Work I Go. Maybe.

Prolonged unemployment is an extremely dangerous thing. Like any other "job" you might have, it doesn't take long at all until you've found yourself in a comfortable "routine". I can't tell you what I am doing all day, but I can tell you that I feel fairly busy. And while I was depressed a while ago, I am no longer because I've been working on that "dream thing" a lot. Plus, I have never been a morning person so I'm not getting up before 8:00 on any morning. Actually, closer to 9:00 if I tell the truth. I've turned back to "teenage time" and I don't go to bed before I have heard Craig Fergenson's monologue. So anything new will be a jarring interruption. And I feel I've had enough change in my life this year, don't you?

But alas, my cobra will run out. And I need to be responsible. And the neighbors may start complaining directly to me if I don't find a way to hire a gardener again. So I may have to say yes if I get the call I think I might get this week.

The job interview I tried so desperately to get to recently, the same one I had to write a follow up letter about myself for - that one - they called me in for a second interview last week and apparently it went well. (In spite of relaying a far-too-personal-for-second-interview story about myself.) We are in salary and benefit negotiations right now. If they find the budget to afford me, I guess I'll be working again.

I will say that I truly do like the people I interviewed with. It is a small company and I think the job would be interesting. I'd travel a bit and I would like that again, I think. The negatives: it is far, far away from home. And because my territory would be the east coast, the hours begin early. I mean E-A-R-L-Y. The kind of early that "wakes you up 6 different times every night for fear you've slept through the alarm" early.

I know this potential job offer is a really good thing. It would be a time for rejoicing for millions of Californians who are currently out of work and living on the edge so I feel tremendously guilty about not being on my knees praying for it to happen. But you see, I've got this dream thing going on and I'm not certain how that and a full time job will co-exist.

At this moment, I am sitting on my unmade bed in the middle of the day, my windows open, staring at the view of my tree and the valley below. There is a very comfortable breeze blowing through; peaceful. I am blogging and making plans. I have some exciting things to ponder and pursue. And I am barefoot. I could be on the phone, or across the desk with a client, trying desperately to close business and make my quota. I could be filling out endless forms, useless reports, and working hard to act like someone I cannot abide is someone I have the utmost respect and admiration for because that's business politics. Let me see, which should I choose? (Hint: this is a math question.)

Well, the very comfortable breeze pays me nothing. So you know the answer. And so do I.